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5 money tips that will save your marriage

Friday, 30 June 2017
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Did you know that money is the major reason behind friction in many marriages?

Financial harmony is a must among married couple for their relationship to be successful. Though money is all about validation, freedom, respect, security, and happiness, it is more a source of power. It’s the financial power struggle that causes major stress in marriages. This is more so when one spouse earns and the other doesn’t.  Overtime this power play gets ugly and eventually wears down the marriage. 

So, how do you save your marriage from money struggles? Here are a few tips.

Talk about money

Don’t sweep any financial detail under the rug. Frankly speak with your spouse about your individual financial position. Share your goals, values, habits and expectations. If your spouse does not have an income, or if you earn more than your spouse, ensure you are considerate with the decision making powers, instead of just trying to dominate the relationship. 

MergeFinancewithSpouse

Be transparent

It’s very important to keep your money discussions as transparent as possible. Refrain from having money secrets with your spouse.  If you’ve lost money trading or have won a bonanza, let your spouse know about it. Hiding these financial details will surely take a toll on your marriage. However remember not to nag or shame your partner for past mistakes. Just remember to make the talk productive by looking only at the way forward.

Maintain both individual and joint accounts

Though having separate finances may seem ideal and empowering initiatially, in the long run it may not be very easy to deal with the dynamics of family expenses. When factors such as children, home purchases, mortgages and other debts come your way, the best strategy would be to have both individual and merged accounts in the right proportion. One school of thought suggests that 80% of both your incomes can go into a joint account while the remaining 20% can be divided equally in your individual accounts.  This way, the joint account can be used to handle expenses like groceries, dine outs, medical and utility bills, school fees, investments, mortgages, and other big purchases. The individual account can be used for personal expenses.

Appreciate differences 

In any relationship, appreciating the differences and playing to each other‘s strengths is a sure recipe for winning. This applies to marriages too. If your spouse is a great saver, then let her take care of budgeting, investments, and savings.  If your partner is a risk taker, then give her some space with timeframe associated goals. This way even though her strength is capitalised, the risk of money loss is taken into consideration.

Realise that strength is in unity

Now that you are a couple, the first thing you need to know is that, you are strongest when united. So, if one person has more debt than the other, then instead of getting aloof, think of ways you can jointly repay the debt, without any delay. By being together you will be able to solve any money issue easily.

Remember finances need not be a marriage killer! It can infact be an invisible bond that binds you together with love. 

 

Did you know that money is the major reason behind friction in many marriages?

Financial harmony is a must among married couple for their relationship to be successful. Though money is all about validation, freedom, respect, security, and happiness, it is more a source of power. It’s the financial power struggle that causes major stress in marriages. This is more so when one spouse earns and the other doesn’t.  Overtime this power play gets ugly and eventually wears down the marriage.

So, how do you save your marriage from money struggles? Here are a few tips.

Talk about money

Don’t sweep any financial detail under the rug. Frankly speak with your spouse about your individual financial position. Share your goals, values, habits and expectations. If your spouse does not have an income, or if you earn more than your spouse, ensure you are considerate with the decision making powers, instead of just trying to dominate the relationship.

Be transparent

It’s very important to keep your money discussions as transparent as possible. Refrain from having money secrets with your spouse.  If you’ve lost money trading or have won a bonanza, let your spouse know about it. Hiding these financial details will surely take a toll on your marriage. However remember not to nag or shame your partner for past mistakes. Just remember to make the talk productive by looking only at the way forward.

Maintain both individual and joint accounts

Though having separate finances may seem ideal and empowering initiatially, in the long run it may not be very easy to deal with the dynamics of family expenses. When factors such as children, home purchases, mortgages and other debts come your way, the best strategy would be to have both individual and merged accounts in the right proportion. One school of thought suggests that 80% of both your incomes can go into a joint account while the remaining 20% can be divided equally in your individual accounts.  This way, the joint account can be used to handle expenses like groceries, dine outs, medical and utility bills, school fees, investments, mortgages, and other big purchases. The individual account can be used for personal expenses.

Appreciate differences

In any relationship, appreciating the differences and playing to each other‘s strengths is a sure recipe for winning. This applies to marriages too. If your spouse is a great saver, then let her take care of budgeting, investments, and savings.  If your partner is a risk taker, then give her some space with timeframe associated goals. This way even though her strength is capitalised, the risk of money loss is taken into consideration.

Realise that strength is in unity

Now that you are a couple, the first thing you need to know is that, you are strongest when united. So, if one person has more debt than the other, then instead of getting aloof, think of ways you can jointly repay the debt, without any delay. By being together you will be able to solve any money issue easily.

Remember finances need not be a marriage killer! It can infact be an invisible bond that binds you together with love. 

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